.: Raising A Child :.

“If I had my child to raise all over again, I’d build self-esteem first, and the house later. I’d finger-paint more, and point the finger less. I would do less correcting and more connecting. I’d take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes. I’d take more hikes and fly more kites. I’d stop playing serious, and seriously play. I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars. I’d do more hugging and less tugging.“ - Diane Loomans

.: ID, Please :.

Six years ago, I got asked for ID to prove my age.

Six years later, at the very same The Star (fka StarCity) casino, I was asked to provide ID for my age.

Are you even kidding me? Like seriously, I am double digit way beyond the legal age!

.: Family :.

The one thing I miss most about being in a foreign country is my family.

I have had been really really close to my family for as long as I can remember. Birthdays are only celebrated with them, not even close friends. I am also exceptionally close to my maternal cousins, and up to this time and age, we are still keeping in touch with each other and meeting up ever so often.

I "left them" and moved here, and there are times when I miss them so bad - even with modern technologies of communication. There's nothing like a meeting up for a good ol' chat over coffee. But on the other hand, I am also glad to have "gained" a new family here. The husband's uncle and aunt has been exceptionally hospitable, housing myself for the first two weeks I was here. Even until now, we drop by ever so often to their place on weekends - and aunties, being aunties - would cook up a tray of delicacies that I just love! Lo mai kai. Char keoy teow (charcoal mind you, so there's that 'wok' taste). Hong tau chou. Man chi keok. Kai fun. Laksa. Roti canai. Oh my, I think I have more Malaysian food here in Sydney than I did back in KL!

We had a great time celebrating her nephew's boy's 4th birthday (or was it 5th?). We had fun with water balloons and water guns - I tell you, the adults were more excited than the two kids!

Uncle and aunty has helped us alot in settling in. And I truly thank God for that.

.: Choices, Choices, Choices :.

It's never easy for me to make decisions - especially one that involves a long term commitment of that sorts.

In a new country, it's a different ball game altogether. To learn the rules of the games and to play it well. It takes a lil courage, and an even bigger step of faith. But I believe that we will both make the right choice at the end of it all.

Praying for wisdom and disernment.

It will be a bold move if we say yes.

.: Achievement Unlocked :.

Achievement unlocked.

 

Bring on the next one!

 

.: Three Months :.

A week and a half ago marks my third month here. I must admit, it was relatively smooth sailing for the first two and the half month, and I thought that I was adapting really well, until it just hit me.

I was not well, physically - with some gastro problems which was more than just gastritis, and because of that couldn't eat much and that aggravated my gastritis even more. I was emotionally down as well, feeling that I have lost grip of my life, and I was homesick as well, and one thing led to another - I had an emotional breakdown. Just like that. At that very particular moment, I felt so down and low, that I just bawled my eyes out.

I was very thankful that the husband was very understanding and just gave me space to figure out things myself. I was also thankful for the supportive familia back in Malaysia that was sending prayers and virtual hugs across. And also for my friends who was giving words of encouragement throughout the whole ordeal. But most of all, I was thankful for God's grace throughout - and though there were times where I felt completely alone, knowing that He was by my side helped me through all this.

I'm glad to say that I am feeling more better the past week. And in fact, just yesterday, I had this higher feeling of happiness and contentment - that lasted for a whole day. And that is a really good feeling that I have yet to feel for quite some time. And it really felt so good, I was glowing from inside out!

My life ain't perfect now. It will never be. Not yesterday, not today, not tomorrow, not ever. But I thank God for His gracious reminder that I indeed could feel this sense of happiness and peace once again.

Peace I leave with you, my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. (John 14 : 27)

.: Breaking Rules :.

You’ll learn, as you get older, that rules are made to be broken. Be bold enough to live life on your terms, and never, ever apologize for it. Go against the grain, refuse to conform, take the road less traveled instead of the well-beaten path. Laugh in the face of adversity, and leap before you look. Dance as though EVERYBODY is watching. March to the beat of your own drummer. And stubbornly refuse to fit in!

- Mandy Hale -

.: Only Hope :.

There's nothing like rewatching the sappy ol movies that you have watched a million times.

And there's nothing like crying to the exact same scenes, even though you know all the plots and the ending and have watched it over and over again.

Sometimes, love can be painted and potrayed so beautifully - and what makes this movie, A Walk To Remember, even more beautiful is that this novel is inspired by the author's very own sister. And it beautiful, just beautiful.

If you haven't watch the movie - do.

If you haven't read the book - do.

Read or watch it first, it doesn't matter. Both movie and novel will move you to tears, so keep a Kleenex handy.



There's a song that's inside of my soul

It's the one that I've tried to write over and over again

I'm awake in the infinite cold 

But you sing to me over and over and over again

 

So I lay my head back down 

And I lift my hands 

And pray to be only Yours I

pray to be only Yours I

know now you're my only hope

 

Sing to me the song of the stars

Of your galaxy dancing and laughing

And laughing again

When it feels like my dreams are so far

Sing to me of the plans that You have for me over again

I give You my destiny

I'm giving You all of me

I want Your symphony

Singing in all that I am

At the top of my lungs I'm giving it back

.: Love Keeps No Records Of Wrong :.

On a random day, of a random conversation

Kath : Dear... When's the last time you gave me flowers?

JC : Oh, so you are now keeping records of that as well?

Kath : Well, yeah. Coz the bible says "love keeps no records of wrongs", but it doesn't say "love keeps no record of rights" so I am just recalling when was the last time you did something right by sending me flowers.

JC: Wow, I can't win with you, can I?

.: Project Status Updated :.

The last time I updated this list was a year and the half ago, so here's to a more recent one

On-going Projects/KIV Projects

• Project Casa III
• Project Castle II

Completed Projects

• Project Greenfield
• Project Turf
• Project Wallaby
• Project Spring
• Project Masterpiece
• Project Umbrella
• Project Scribe
• Project Casa II
• Project Casa
• Project Castle II
• Project Castle
• Project Downhill

Abandoned Projects

• Project Moo Moo
• Project Narnia
• Project Island
• Project Prince

.: Untitled :.

Currently listening to Gabrielle - Out Of Reach

Hello world! Yes, I am finally back from the long hiatus.

It's been quite a journey for me this past few months.

Left behind my family, friends, job, home and everything else that I grew up being so familiar with - packed what I could fit into a 30kg luggage and flew across the Indian Ocean (or Pacific Ocean - pardon my lack of knowledge when it comes to geography) out of my comfort zone, to this new place.

Started a new job. Stayed in a new place. Experiencing the new weather, the new culture and everything new. Trying to make new friends, whilst keeping in touch with old friends who are now based here.

It's been quite a journey, and I must admit it wasn't as easy for someone who have never left the comfort of home. 

Currently listening to Eric Clapton - Blue Eyes Blue

Having said that, I have been very blessed to have had some pathways made easy - and for that I am absolutely thankful. I have had secured a job, I had found a good place to rent, have had the support of family based here, have made good new friends, and much more.

I have absolute joy in experiencing fun things to do - the weekly farmers market, the beautiful park nearby my workplace, the lovely beach, and so much more.

Having said that, I very much miss everything and everyone back home, and sometimes I feel sad thinking about the people and things I leave behind, but thankfully it's mitigated by technology! I could skype with grandma and hear her say "chiak pah beh?" which means have I eaten.

Currently listening to Al Green - How Can You Mend A Broken Heart

Today's one of the days where I'm beginning to feel a little down. A mixture of being homesickness - missing the friends and family back home, husband being away, a bad case of gastric, the general melancholy feel (hence the selection of songs that I'm listening to). But I am not going to dwell on that - and share all the ups that I have had last week.

The weekend started well with a dinner date with a ex-highschool mate. We had (or at least I had on my part) so much fun - catching up on anything and everything under the sun.

There was (wait, select another emo song on Youtube)....

Currently playing Faith Hill - Let Me Let Go

... there was this part where we had conversations about getting his parent's PR and one thing led to another, and to cut a really long story short - I said "Perhaps your sister (who is about 18 years old now), will marry someone and gain a PR here."

"No." he said. "She too young, it will take at least another five years or more."

"Who knows?" I said. "She might find her true love soon and the get married."

He gave a bemused smirk. "What? What are you smirking at?" I asked.

Currently playing Mandy Moore - Someday We'll Know

"TRUE LOVE" he said, and started laughing. I joined him laughing, shook my head and asked him since when we have all be so cynical about true love.

There was more to the conversation after that, but I still smile when I replay this conversation in my head. As we get older, do we really become so cynical? Or is it just what it is - that TRUE love is a myth?

If I can just ask God just one question - why aren't  you hear with me?

Sorry, singing to the chorus of the song. Perks of being alone - sing my heart out (without disturbing the neighbors I hope). Gonna replay this song again, I love Mandy's vocals.

I was watching this movie "Kate and Leopold" on Saturday night, and I shared with my crazy bunch of friends on whatsapp this quote from the movie, which also coincidentally related to - LOVE.

Maybe that whole love thing is just a grown-up version of Santa Claus; just a myth we've been fed since childhood. So, we keep buying magazines, joining clubs, and doing therapy and watching movies with hit pop songs played over love montages all in a pathetic attempt to explain why our love Santa keeps getting caught in the chimney.

Then one conversation led to another, and then we had this really, really hot, steamy, X-rated conversations. It was so so so dirty that I just had to say this to them

"You guys, as we get older, we get dirtier. One day we'll end up being dirty old woman. Crap, I thought we will be sophisticated old ladies, drinking tea with pinky fingers sticking out and having scones."

To which the best respond to that was "We are sophisticated, just with sexy imagination!"

I love my crazy, horny bunch of friends. It's good to know that there are some things that never change! :) And that's why I miss them so much, coz no matter how good my new friends can be here, I can never take our conversations to the level that I take with this bunch of girls!

Currently listening to A Great Big World & Christina - Say Something

I can't believe I am going to be thirty next year. I always thought that when I reach the big 3-0, I would have know what I want to do with my life. Or at least have achieved something - whatever it may be. I still feel so inadequate at times.

And I..... will swallow my pride, you're the one that I love.... and I'm saying goodbye..

Currently listening to The Corrs - One Night

But for one night, it was so right, that I gave you my heart, my love, my heart. Just for one night, my body, my soul. Just for one night, my love, my love. For one night, one night, one night.

Currently listening to One Republic - Stop and Stare

Looks like I have nothing much else to type. And my stomach is still a little restless - I don't know why there's so much acidic activities going on. Hopefully it will be all better tomorrow.

Til we meet again, dear ol' faithful blog.

xoxo

Kathlynn

.: Make The Ordinary Come Alive :.

Do not ask your children
to strive for extraordinary lives.
Such striving may seem admirable,
but it is a way of foolishness.
Help them instead to find the wonder
and the marvel of an ordinary life.
Show them the joy of tasting
tomatoes, apples, and pears.
Show them how to cry
when pets and people die.
Show them the infinite pleasure
in the touch of a hand.
And make the ordinary come alive for them.
The extraordinary will take care of itself.


William Martin, The Parent's Tao Te Ching: Ancient Advice for Modern Parents

.: Escape From The Dungeon :.

Had a wonderful weekend with the cousins and brother in a game Escape Room. It was mind boggling and challenging, and the fact that we lost (boo-hoo) was sort of like a taunt to come back and try again.

In the words of Arnie "We will be back!"

.: Do Not Stand At My Grave And Weep :.

Do not stand at my grave and weep,

I am not there; I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow,

I am the diamond glints on snow,

I am the sunlight on ripened grain,

I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you awaken in the morning’s hush

I am the swift uplifting rush

Of quiet birds in circled flight.

I am the soft stars that shine at night.

Do not stand at my grave and cry,

I am not there; I did not die.

- Mary Elizabeth Frye-

.: Little Milestones :.

Sometimes, it is only good for one's soul to take a breather and celebrate little milestones achieved. I feel that on my part, I often neglect to acknowledge and give a proverbial pat on my back and say "job well done" when a task is completed or a goal is achieved

Yesterday, the husband and I "celebrated" the achievement of this little milestone, one where we concluded the financial obligations of Project Castle, hence grouping it with Project Casa.

We still have No-Name Project, which is dear to my heart, because that's the first property we purchased 6 years back. And then there's of course Project Turf & Project Greenfield, but which one of it is under DIBS, so it doesnt warrant any obligations til 2 years down the road.

Our new goal set, if Project Wallaby kicks in, is to get one abroad.

But if Project Wallaby doesn't work out for us, then we will also grab another one (or two) here in the near future.

So for now, its two down and three to go.

.: Perfection :.

We are the girls with anxiety disorders, filled appointment books, five-year plans. We take ourselves very, very seriously. We are the peacemakers, the do-gooders, the givers, the savers. We are on time, overly prepared, well read, and witty, intellectually curious, always moving… We pride ourselves on getting as little sleep as possible and thrive on self-deprivation. We drink coffee, a lot of it. We are on birth control, Prozac, and multivitamins… We are relentless, judgmental with ourselves, and forgiving to others. We never want to be as passive-aggressive as our mothers, never want to marry men as uninspired as our fathers… We are the daughters of the feminists who said, “You can be anything,” and we heard, “You have to be everything.”

Quote by Courtney Martin, author of Perfect Girls, Starving Daughters

.: Fair And Equal :.

What's fair isn't necessarily equal, and what's equal isn't necessarily fair.

But something I wonder what happens when fair isn't fair because it isn't equal. Something I'm just trying to comprehend of late.

Food for thoughts?

.: Mitch Albom :.

A few Mitch Albom quotes which I would like to share from my recent reads. I highly recommend these three books (of which I have completed). The reads really make you reflect alot about my life. Am moving on next to Five People You Meet In Heaven.

“So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they're busy doing things they think are important. This is because they're chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.”
- Mitch Albom : Tuesdays With Morrie -

“Try to imagine a life without timekeeping. You probably can’t. You know the month, the year, the day of the week. There is a clock on your wall or the dashboard of your car. You have a schedule, a calendar, a time for dinner or a movie. Yet all around you, timekeeping is ignored. Birds are not late. A dog does not check its watch. Deer do not fret over passing birthdays. an alone measures time. Man alone chimes the hour. And, because of this, man alone suffers a paralyzing fear that no other creature endures. A fear of time running out.”
- Mitch Albom : The Time Keeper -

“Tell me about your family," I said. And so she did. I listened intently as my mother went through each branch of the tree. Years later, after the funeral, Maria had asked me questions about the family - who was related to whom - and I struggled. I couldn't remember. A big chunk of our history had been buried with my mother. You should never let your past disappear that way.”
- Mitch Albom : For One More Day -

“When a baby comes into the world, its hands are clenched, right? Like this?" He made a fist. "Why? Because a baby not knowing any better, wants to grab everything, to say the whole world is mine. But when an old person dies, how does he do so? With his hands open. Why? Because he has learned his lesson." "What lesson?" I asked. He stretched open his empty fingers. "We can take nothing with us.” 
- Mitch Albom : Have A Little Faith -

.: Ridin' On That Midnight Train :.

I’ve been taking the train to and fro work of late.

And there was this particular incident that made me quite mad early that morning.

A lady, probably in her third trimester, boarded a semi-loaded coach of the KJ LRT line.

Nobody, and I tell you, nobody was kind enough to give up a seat for her.

Fine, I will exempt those elderlies, which mind you, are not many as most of them are already standing up.

And I will also exempt the ones that dozed off.

And I will also give in to those who did not notice her (who could have missed a fully pregnant woman is beyond me, but whatever).

But there was this particular lady, who just stared at the pregnant woman, yawned and started playing with her phone.

How rude! I stared back at her, hoping that she would have caught whiff of my angry stare, or I was hoping that somehow, telekinetically or magically, I would be able to get the message through her. Alas, no such luck. I was contemplating telling her off, but I felt it was not right to victimize her as others sitting are equally guilty. I saw her picked her bag, and left when the train coach doors open.

Oh good, the pregnant lady has a chance to sit. I saw her slowly making her way towards the seat. And zoom came running by, a perfectly able woman, like a hungry vulture, and plonked her bl**dy a** onto the seat.

OH MY GAWD!

From thereon, I’ve learned.

I boarded a relatively empty train back home that very same day, and sat on one of the seats. The next stop, KLCC, many passengers came in. I saw a lady handling two small toddlers walking in with both of her hands hold each of her kids. I stood up, tapped her on her shoulder, and offered her my seat. The lady sitting next to me must have felt bad and also quickly got to her feet and offered her seat to the lady with kids. She was reluctant to accept at first, but after I insisted and told her it was dangerous for her two young one to stand anyways, she ushered the two kids to sit.

Sometimes, I suppose, you must make someone in the situation ‘feel bad’ about it first, and if they have any decency left in them, to do the same.

And if there’s an empty seat in the train – take it. So that if and when there’s someone who needs it more is seen at least you have control over letting that person have that seat.

Ugh. Just one of those pet peeves that really gets to me.

.: First Step :.

Take the first step in FAITH.

You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.

.: Financial Goals :.

Having financial goals scares me (ironically), not because it's relatively easier to achieve them - as compared to my fitness goals, but it's because of the ok-so-I've-made-it-what's-next moment.

I told myself that I was going to achieve a certain level of income (salary) before I hit the big 3-0, but with God's blessing, I achieved that goal when I was a few months short from turning 27. Then, I just don't know what I should push myself to achieve next.

I look at the consolidated net worth of The Husband and I, and sometimes I wonder if we push ourselves too much, or is it possible for us to achieve even more than that?

So, I guess, what I'm really about to say is that I am to commit to one financial goal for the time being, which is to achieve a million ringgit in net worth (all my assets, less out all my liabilities) - solo i.e. without the Husband's numbers. And because all goals should be SMART, the T being time-bound, I hope that achieve this state by 30. A million ringgit is no biggie - people half my age have already raked in millions and millions of dollars anyways. But it only translates to two years of me working hard and making the capital work hard for me as well.

Let's just see if it's even remotely possible.

.: New Year, Old Goal, New Goal :.

With regrets, I would like to report that I have not achieved my 2013 resolution of 365km in a year.

But, I am not giving up just yet. So this year, 2014, I am rolling forward last year's goal in addition to a new goal this year, which is both fitness & health related.

So, firstly, to run 365km for the year.

And secondly, to have at least 365 eat-clean meals, which actually means at least once a day I have something clean for breakfast, lunch or dinner.

Eating clean is not a diet, merely a lifestyle choice, one I hope to maintain not only for the year, but throughout. It's not really that difficult, I will just have to eliminate processed food & preservatives. So it'd be loads of fresh veges, fresh meat (no more sausages & ground burger meat) and whole wheat & grains.

A little like Paleo diet, but as mentioned, is not a diet, it's a lifestyle.

Wish me luck! :)