.: Not-So-Simple Thoughts :.

Once upon a time we were kids. We had fun. We did things without dwelling so much into the consequences. We ran. We played. We laugh. Hakunamatata no?

Then we grew up. The “fun” is now replaced with "responsibilities". We are now doing things taking into consideration our future, our partners, our parents and much more. We stop running, and started working. We stopped playing, and started strategizing. We stopped laughing altogether (the obligatory polite laughs we make during small talk doesn’t count). In other words, we stopped being kids and we really didn’t live happily ever after now, did we?

I am at this crossroad where I need to make certain critical decisions that will make or break my future. Not as critical as the decision I made 10 months back (Happy 10 monthivarsary dear), but still, a big leap nonetheless.

I hate making decisions. Really, I do. It was never easy for me. And it never got easier now that there is another big stakeholder in my life to consider.

Low risk. Low returns. High risk. High returns. But, I might get burn in the process. Do it now, so that you don’t look back and regret. Stay put, perhaps there’s a bigger fish the next catch. Take it or leave it. Hold on to it as long as you can. Think of your future. Think of our future. Do this now while you are still young. You are still young, why do you need to do this now?

Just some (mind you, some not ALL) of the train of thoughts that run thru my head in my morning drive. That is why in the morning, I am like on autopilot mode all the way from home to my office. And that is also the reason why I have my so-called quiet time in the morning, so that let this train of thoughts just shoots out all the way so at least I have a clearer mind by the time I reach work. Come end of the working day, I will have the next new string of thoughts all the way home and even when I am asleep. The cycle repeats itself the next morning.

So.

Sigh.

It sucks being all grown up doesn’t it?

To make reality even worse, Joel called me aunty in Sunday school last Sunday.

OHH AMM GEE!