Friday, July 30, 2010

.: Family :.

It’s been a grueling week, as I try to balance between the demands of work, wedding preparations & Project Castle.

I don’t see why some people don’t understand and still choose to criticize and talk bad about every step of the things I have done or will do. I know end of it all it is indeed OUR CHOICE and I do not need affirmation from anyone to concur with the decisions I make.

But aren’t families are supposed to be understanding, or even if they are unable to comprehend, at least supportive?

But there are those few who are not, those few who choose to look at me critically and waiting at every moment for me to make the wrong move so that they could have the pleasure and joy of pinpointing my mistakes out not only to me but to the whole wide world (more often than not in a very exaggerated manner).

It is not exactly the kind of family environment I would like to be in, and if I am totally and brutally honest to myself, perhaps this is the reason why I am distancing myself from these few people. The negativity is not edifying and the hurt or pain they create (whether consciously or sub consciously so) can’t just be simply erased just like that.

It is true to the word that the ones closest to you could potentially be the one to hurt you most. And perhaps this is why their actions hurt me so much – because at one point I thought they truly care about me and I so did I of them.

Of course there are those who have been there for me thru it all, and for that, I am truly appreciative and thankful for all the support that they have given me throughout.

End of it all, I came to a simple conclusion. It could have been worse. I know families that are way far more ‘dysfunctional’, and perhaps this environment that I am are of ‘normal’ standards.

But sometimes, I just wish that this relationship can go back to they way it was. Where we were all closer and things was less complicated.

Ohana means family.
Family means nobody gets left behind.
Or forgotten.

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